Happy New Year (Feliz Ano Prospero Nuevo) Amigas & Amigos;
Are you all as excited for 2014 as am I? 2013 kicked most of our asses and now to get back on that damn burro and ride it into the glorious New Year’s sunset.
Pismo Beach was the first stop of my book signing tour on Monday evening, Jan. 6th which was the same night as the National Championship for College Football between Florida State and Auburn. Well, as I was driving from Scottsdale making my way up to Pismo Beach, my most direct route took me onto 210 West, you guessed it at about 1:30 - 2:00 pm right past the Rose Bowl in Pasadena, California. At first I wondering what in the heck is going on with all this traffic, I left specially early at 6:00 am to avoid the LA bumper to bumper ride down memory lane. Why do I call it “memory lane?” Because when you’re stuck in traffic for minutes and hours upon the asphalt blacktop, there is a lot of time on your hands to recollect about the past, to think about all those good times, bad times and lost times with relatives and friends. Should spend some time rehearsing for the future as well and thinking ahead; but, realistically we are thinking about something that has already occurred in our life, in our day at work or at play.
I’m cruising along at a comfortable 70 mph in a 65 mph speed zone when red tail lights coming from all 5 lanes including HOV lane are staring back at me and alerting me that something is amiss, awaking me from my bliss with my cruise control fully in progress and lit. At first I’m thinking how bad of an accident lies ahead? Will there be bodies strewn (wrecklessly) across the sewn together tar? How far ahead is this disaster and will I make it to Pismo Beach in time for my book signing and to watch the football game in The Boardroom? That is when I saw the limo with a giant, striped orange and white tail flowing like Tequila from the exterior rear of the black, extra long and luxurious van and the Auburn Tiger stickers pasted to the sides of the vehicle, and at this moment is when a light bulb went off in my head and I said aloud, “Oh my goodness, I forgot the National Championship was being played this year at the Rose Bowl.” I then settled down and enjoyed the crawl, rolled down my tinted windows and started giving thumbs up to the Florida State fans and middle fingers up to the Auburn fans. I don’t dislike Auburn, just tired of SEC fans constantly chattering, chanting, tweeting and twerping that no other conference in College Football can compete with the South East Conference. Oh, is that so – Alabama, who lost to Oklahoma by a two touchdown margin being favored by 14. The Sooners kicked some Crimson Tide butt in a complete football game of one hour by a score of 35 – 21, same score and margin as the Oklahoma Boomer Sooners trounced and gave a good ol’ fashioned ass-whoopin’ to Notre Dame. Yes, the University of Oklahoma handed both teams that played in the 2013 Championship game a 35 – 21 spanking.
Okay, now that the world is back in sequence and I’ve pissed off my SEC fans, time to move on. This year’s BCS Championship game was fun to watch as the SEC fell to an “inferior conference.” I think not! Speaking of which the Oregon Ducks of the PAC 12, that bunch looked like lame ducks in their bowl game – embarrassing is the word I think that I’ve heard most Eugene and surrounding residents use. I would also like to add it was a total “Quack Up.”
I arrived exactly three minutes before game kickoff and had even checked into the Hilton Garden Inn before driving down to the boardwalk area, then carting in my books into The Boardroom Pub for some serious beer drinking and wing eating and book signing while watching football with in between signatures, gulps and bites. This is the last and final BCS (Bowl Championship Series) game. Oh, how I love the feel of those three consonants as they roll off my tongue – Final BCS game! Special thanks to viewers and fans, Steve aka Tim Tebow's older brother, Johnny, Joyce, Tony the cook and Bob the Bartender for an incredible, delightful evening.
Next stop Santa Cruz with its gigantic, sprawling roller coaster and some of the gnarliest Christmas lights at a house in town that would make any Elf blush with or without green and red leotards. I went through a little community known as Watsonville, known for their tasty and delicious strawberries just a few miles south of Santa Cruz.
The City by the Bay always brings a smile to my face and a glow to my heart – the most beautiful city in the United States. I usually have only positive things to write and say about San Francisco, however, a parking incident and an unjustified tow will have their day on paper. First, we’ll discuss the good stuff.
My favorite Mexican food joint in all of Northern California is Tommy’s Mexican Restaurant with owner and bartender Julio Bermejo behind the spirits that flow continuously. This mecca for Tequila drinkers and Food lovers was established by Julio’s father and mother, Mr. and Mrs. Tommy Bermejo in the year 1965 of Our LORD.
I was scheduled for 2 book signings on Wednesday and Thursday nights and I’ve also been working on obtaining my Master (MBA) in Tequila for nearly four, long years which can be taken only at Tommy’s Mexican Restaurant by Tequila instructor and aficionado Julio Bermejo who is also the Ambassador from the U.S. to Mexico for Tequila. It was on Wednesday night, January 8th which is Elvis Presley’s birthday. Elvis was born in 1935 and if he had not left the building at such an early age, he would have been 79 years young that last Wednesday evening. I had completed my 35th tequila sampling from the nation’s best selection of premium 100% Agave Tequila. My 35th Tequila sampling was an Extra Anejo Tequila – Herradura Seleccion Suprema – Unbelievable! I am now studying and drinking for my Ph.D., Dr. Rico Austin – Tequila Ph.D. has a Margarita ring to it and sounds a bit exotic. I do like the sound of that – “paging Dr. Rico, paging Dr. Rico, can you please come to the bar, Dr. Rico, we need you to give a Tequila shot to a beautiful Senorita, she needs your attention right away. Paging Dr. Rico!”
Are you ready for the, what is ironic about this story? Remember, my first novel was “My Bad Tequila” and my second book, an autobiography, “In the Shadow of ELVIS, Perils of a Ghostwriter.” Becoming a “Tequila Master” on Elvis Presley’s birthday – was it “Another coincidence or the subconscious mind at work?”
I now have my Blue Agave Ph.D card readily available for show and tell. This Blue Agave Club is now 8,000 members strong across the globe with nearly 800 members having successfully passed the course thus becoming a “TEQUILA MASTER.” There are nearly 200 members worldwide that have achieved their “TEQUILA Ph.D.” One of the few, the proud, the Tequila Master.
While touring the streets of San Franciso, I found the warmest spot in San Francisco when the sun is shining on Nob Hill. Where else, but on Phoenix Street? - it is less than 1/2 block long and is surrounded by houses on all 3 sides, so gets almost no wind. Pretty wild and I discovered this on my own - don't need no stinkin' tour guide!
Also, Where would you expect to find an old Chinese woman hanging her "Granny Panties" in the window to dry? China Town? Red Light District? Nope, it was Nob Hill, near intersection of Phoenix and Pacific! If you look closely at top window, you can see her hanging her undies in the open! Pictures at the end of the Blog.
Loved a comment from one of my fans at Tommy's book signing! Rico, you are different than most writers / authors in that You don't just observe, You partake in living life, as did Hemingway! WoW, what a compliment!
And now for the finale of the first Blog of 2014! Drum roll please; San Francisco seems to be as corrupt a city as Chicago! My car was illegally impounded and a parking violation added to it. When I went to my car, there was another vehicle in the parking spot and my car had been towed. $452.00 to get it out, once I found where it was located and on the windshield was the violation ticket for another $100.00 The recording at AutoReturn says that if the car is not picked up within a couple of hours an additional $60.00 will be added each few hours until the car is retrieved. Talking with a couple of local residents and a taxi cab driver (that took me to my car – another $40.00), they explained that the city concentrates on vehicles with out-of-state license plates and rental cars. There is a tow hearing that you can request, but, guess what? nothing available for a week and I like most tourists and visitors have to leave. Very disappointed in another branch of government, this time the SF city and SFMTA (San Francisco Municipal Transportation Association). Seems as if every level of government from local to federal and national has corrupt officials and employees. Shame on the City by the Bay. Side note: several cars in the impound area with out of state plates and dust – owners did not have the financial means to retrieve their vehicles while fees and costs are compounded daily. Rita is not a lovely Meter Maid in San Franciso! Here is a breakdown of the costs that equal $592.00:
SF Admin Fee – Excluding Tickets - $254.00
Tow Passenger Vehicle - $218.00
Parking Violation - $100.00
Cab Fare - $40.00
Freedom of Speech, able to Blog and post on Facebook & Twitter - Priceless
Remember there are pictures at the very bottom of the BLOG! If you like this Blog and have not purchased one of my books, please do so, You will be greatly rewarded with entertainment and a knowledge that will have been gained.
Saludos y Vayan con Dios,
Last, but not least, please “LIKE” my new page on Facebook, "ELVIS - (In The Shadow Of)"
Author, Blogger, Tequila Connoisseur, Co-Songwriter, Part-time Movie Star, CEO, Amigo & One Righteous, Fun Dude - MY BAD TEQUILA
"Have a Double Shot of Reality" TM
with "My Bad Tequila" & "In the Shadow of ELVIS, Perils of Ghostwriter" book signing with members - Joyce, Johnny, Rico, Steve aka Tim Tebow's older brother and cook Tony, picture taken by bartender Bob!
right off Pacific, the warmest place in SF, on Nob Hill,
notice the Bay Bridge in the far background!
An Uncle Rico discovery - no tour guides were used nor harmed!
Uncle Rico is not a peeping tom, just happened to walk by on Pacific!!!
"In order to write about life, first you must live it." Papa Hemingway RIP!
Unarmed & slightly dangerous when Tequila is added!
& Writer / Author Rico Austin, first bottle of Tequila consumed 2014
It's going to be a Fun, Memorable Year!!! - Rico
"Stay Thirsty My Friend" - most interesting man in the world
"Mas Tequila" - Sammy Hagar
"You'll see the true reflection of me when the Tequila bottle is empty" - Rico
"Buenos Noches" - Mexican Amigas saying goodnight